In what area of your life do you most need change, and what will you do about it this year?

Almost five months after I began (I originally planned to complete it before my birthday in September), I have finally come to the end of the Consider Your Ways series, based on questions from Don Whitney of the Center for Biblical Spirituality. (It's come recommended by the GirlTalk ladies and Justin Taylor, so you know it'll be good.) Through it, I have been forced to think about all areas of my life and how I should be glorifying God though it. There is plenty for me to get stuck into over the next year.

I'll let Mr Whitney have the last word on this for now:

So let's evaluate our lives, make plans and goals, and live this new year with biblical diligence, remembering that, "The plans of the diligent lead surely to advantage" (Proverbs 21:5). But in all things let's also remember our dependence on our King who said, "Apart from me you can do nothing" (John 15:5).

I have been noticing just how much I fill up life with noise and activities. I wake up to the radio and listen to it on my way to work. Work itself is full of bustle and conversations. When I get home, even without realising it, I sing away to myself. Even sometimes when I am outwardly quiet, I find my mind whirling around like a dervish that I don't notice the silence.

I decided to spend some time this year working on the discipline of solitude. Jesus himself spent forty days in solitude as preparation for his ministry (Luke 4:1-15). It was also his own practice to spend time in prayer alone throughout his ministry (Luke 5:16).

Charles Spurgeon said:

I have been able to spend some time trying to build on this discipline. I went to a beautiful isolated beach, armed only with my Bible, a flask of tea and some gloves. (It looks beautiful but is still Scotland!) Thankfully, there was no-one else there as I sat and read and prayed.

It was wonderful to really have a conversation with God without all the distractions of everything at home. I really felt Satan trying to attack, to drag me away from fellowship and many things I had said or done in the past were brought up. However, I was able to spend such a wonderful time in prayer though, asking for forgiveness for the many sins in my life. Now when these are dragged up, I am able to say, "I've been forgiven for that. There is no more to be said on the matter."

The feeling of being uncontactable for those few hours was also so refreshing. There was so little to distract me from that small, still voice of God. That memory of the closeness with God is still giving me strength as I live in our busy world and I look forward to purposefully spending more time in solitude in the future.

If you would be interested in developing this discipline in your own spiritual life, I really recommend Silence and Solitude..."For The Purpose Of Godliness" by Don Whitney. You can also read about others' experiences of solitude in this week's Carnival of Beauty.

But the LORD is in his holy temple;
let all the earth keep silence before him
Habakkuk 1:20

What's the most important new item you want to buy this year?

For my spiritual growth, I have decided to buy the Bible on CD to allow me listen to God's word while driving to and from work. A friend has bought Max Maclean's reading of the English Standard Version and really recommended it as a way to know the Bible better.

On a more frivolous note, I have finally invested in a digital camera, especially after being reprimanded by Jonny and Amanda for not owning one! I owned my first camera when I was about 5. It was a blue Fisher Price camera that took 110 film and had a hole at the top where real flash bulbs (which could only be used once) fitted. You'll see in the photo that it even had rubber-covered ends to stop it breaking when dropped. Sadly, I don't know what happened to mine, but I don't think I was a particularly gifted photographer as a child.

I bought my next and last camera the same year I started university. It uses film and has served me well. (My mother likes to tell me, "Your camera always takes good pictures!") However, after three years of saying I wanted to get a digital SLR, I have finally (literally, in the last few days) got round to it! To celebrate, I taken a photo of where my Wise Men have travelled after friends visited a few days ago! I'll be taking a lot more photos in the days to come and, as they are much easier to transfer on to the computer than film photos, I look forward to sharing them.

She considers a field and buys it;
with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
Proverbs 31:16

If those who know you best gave you one piece of advice, what would they say? Would they be right? What will you do about it?

I do sometimes I would get overwhelmed with everything I have to do. I've been feeling a bit like that recently. Work is crazily busy and I have to work every second weekend. The way doctors are trained is being changed in August so there is a lot of uncertainty about our job situation for next year - they are expecting 20,000 doctors to be unemployed in the UK! Already many of my friends have moved to Australia and New Zealand because they can't get work here. I'm not entirely sure what my future holds at all so I am trying to see this as an exciting, rather than a terrifying and unsetlling, time!

I shared this with a close friend and sister in Christ. She has only just been introduced to the wonderful writings of Elisabeth Elliot, but she has clearly been paying attention when she pointed this bit out! (She might have also found this at Amy's Humble Musings where she also blogged about this recently.)

I had learned a principle from my mother many years before: Do the next thing. And it is wonderful how simple it is when we just do the next thing.

That's all we need to - just to do the next thing. We are not given our life's plan, probably because it would overwhelm us more, but just asked to live day by day, asking for our daily bread, asking for forgiveness daily, studying the Bible daily, letting tomorrow worry about itself and taking up our crosses daily. I really do believe this; I just need to act like I do!

Keep falsehood and lies far from me;
give me neither poverty nor riches,
but give me only my daily bread.
Proverbs 30:8

What one biblical doctrine do you most want to understand better this year, and what will you do about it?

There are so many things I don't understand, but I have decided to spend some time focusing on the doctrine of the Trinity this year. I believe in the Trinity and I understand, at some level, the concept of God being three persons in one. I want to really understand it though, as much as it is possible this side of heaven!

This is particularly important as I spend a lot of time talking to Muslim colleagues and friends who have no understanding of this and believe that Christians worship several gods. (I have also discovered that many Muslims think the Trinity is God the Father, Jesus and Mary.)

Part of the difficulty is that the term "Trinity" is never used in the Bible although there are many references throughout both the Old and New Testament to the Trinity. I want to take proper time studying the Bible so that I can understand this doctrine, which is so central to our Christian faith, and hopefully also be in a position to better explain it to others. Friends have recommended Donald Macleod's little book, Shared Life, so I might start there.

Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit
Matthew 28:19

What's the single most important thing you could do to improve the quality of your commute this year?

I have to leave the house over 2 hours before starting work to make it on time. I work in a different city to where I live, but have not been keen to move there. Partly that's because my contract there is only for a year and thereafter I don't where in the country I will be. The main reason is though that I love my church because of the preaching and my church family there. So it looks like the lengthy commute will continue...!

Sometimes I drive up, which is now getting a little more stressful with the icier mornings and the scary drivers who come right up behind me before overtaking. It does however give me a good opportunity to listen to the news on the radio, although I have worryingly become a big fan of the Archers, BBC Radio 4's gentle agricultural drama aimed at middle class middle-aged and elderly people! I have decided to improve my journey though by listening to the Bible on CD. Friends have recommended it to me and then I found a good article about listening to an Audio Bible from Occupied with the Word. I'll let you know how I get on.

Other days, I take the train. This means getting up earlier, which, with the dark mornings, currently feels like getting up in the middle of night! I like the chance to get a cup of tea on the train (very important for waking up purposes!) and the time to read and pray undisturbed - aside from the fact that if you have a Bible open on your lap, no-one else will sit next to you!

So faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ.
Romans 10:17

To what need or ministry will you try to give an unprecedented amount this year?

I have been considering this question a lot, knowing the great needs of the many ministries and charities that exist. As we are told by Jesus to "not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing", this will have to be another question that I will answer privately.

I'd like to share a few thoughts from a seminar I attended a few years ago however. We were reminded only Christians will support Christian causes, so we should remember these first in our giving. He also made the point that that we can't take photos of lost souls and that we should be careful of emotionally responding to visual appeals. Of course, this does not preclude giving spontanaouely but that we should not forget the real need of those people to hear the Gospel and to know Christ.

But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.
Matthew 6:3-4

A few weeks ago, I was considering the question: What's one new way you could be a blessing to your pastor (or to another who ministers to you) this year?

A friend later (without knowing about this) sent me this website, Revive Our Hearts, which has lots of different documents like prayer guides, sermon outlines and thematic lists. I was particularly interested to see 31 Days of Praying for your Pastor. It is certainly something I can use to more purposefully and comprehensively pray for him.

I was pleased to see another list beside it though: 31 Days of Praying for Your Pastor's Wife. It is so easy to forget the phenomenal job that these women do; supporting their husband at home and in his work, raising their children - often more on their own due to all the evening and weekend meetings, opening their homes to the whole church, being constantly available to the congregation, sharing their husband with a whole church who constantly make demands on his time and energy along with all the expectations that the congregation will have on the wife's role in the church. It must be a lonely job some of the time, especially when fitting into a new congregation and not wishing to favour people. Ministers' wives (along with their children) are not supposed to have any spiritual crises, and when they do, their husband or father is their pastor.

As I shared on Tuesday, there are ministers' wives in the church whom I greatly admire and who have loved me as a daughter. I know that I would not be where I am now spiritually were it not for her example, love and encouragement. This was a very pertinent reminder to pray for these women in this difficult and wonderful situation.

Cast your burden on the LORD, and he will sustain you;
he will never permit the righteous to be moved.
Psalm 55:22

What skill do you most want to learn or improve this year?

When I turned 25 last year, I made a small list of all the things I wanted to do before I turned 30. Almost at the top of this list was "Be able to play the piano".

So I went and bought an electric keyboard from Ebay, which was a surprisingly painless experience. Only two days after the auction closed, it arrived, ready to be played. I had a few old piano books from family and friends, so I dusted off them off and sat down to play. I can now manage to play tunes with BOTH hands!!! At the SAME time!!! Yes, I know, amazing! I am really enjoying it though, but I do need to practise more. Now I have told you about it, I really will have to keep practising!

I love singing, so can already read music, but I would also like to be able to play some of the wonderful pieces of music out there. I think it would be an investment in the future too, to be able to play for my family and friends when we meet to praise God in song. I should probably confess though that it will also probably have been a childhood diet of Pride and Prejudice, Little Women, and Little House on the Prairie that make me want to be able to play the piano!

Music expresses that which can not be said and on which it is impossible to be silent.
Victor Hugo, French author (1802-1885)

What's the most important trip you want to take this year?

What an interesting question! Where do I need to go this year? Who do I need to catch up with? Where do I need to be? I haven't managed to come up with an answer but it has made me think.

I used to go on mission trips every summer, but now it is so difficult to get away for anything longer than a week with work. Ah, work does interfere with my social life! Perhaps I need to be organised with things for this summer to try to get back out there. Even though I am officially 'working', I find the concentrated Christian fellowship so refreshing. Of course, the sunshine and the good food doesn't hurt either!

This has also reminded me about all the people whom I need to visit. There are friends and family I need to see - letters, emails and phone calls are great, but it is not the same as seeing someone face-to-face and sharing with them.

Balanced against all of this is again the uncertainity of work after August. I have always planned to spend some time working abroad, so maybe this would be the time to do it. I'm conscious that many of my older friends and colleagues also planned to do medical mission work abroad before getting caught up in work, marriage and family and never doing it after all. I know that it is possible to do this after marriage and with children, but it is more difficult, so maybe I should embrace this season of life and crack on with it.

[The LORD your God] went before you in the way to seek you out a place to pitch your tents, in fire by night and in the cloud by day, to show you by what way you should go.
Deuteronomy 1:33

In what area of your life do you most need growth, and what will you do about it this year?

Oh, there are so many areas that need work! I have found going through these questions such a helpful discipline though. It has made me consider areas of my life that I had almost forgotten about and made me re-evaluate things in light of God and who I am in him.

I have come up with plenty of things to do in my desire to grow, not because if I do these things, I will achieve a higher spiritual plane and be more acceptable to God, but because of my desire to know God more and to reflect him more. Having the accountability here means that I can look back clearly at what I said had to be done, whether I did it, and whether I have learnt anything and grown from it.

Lead me in your truth and teach me,
for you are the God of my salvation;
for you I wait all the day long.
Psalm 25:5

What single blessing from God to you want to seek most earnestly this year?

I think I answered this in the second Consider Your Ways question: What's the most humanly impossible thing you will ask God to do this year?

I continue to pray for my future life, whatever it might hold. The uncertainity of everything is difficult, as I consider my future career choices. The way that doctors are trained is changing here in the UK, but not for better for those of us who want any work-life balance! Motivation on the back of this is difficult when I know that this is not really what I want for my future. I continue to try to take each and every day as it comes, facing its own challenges and delights, knowing that everything is in God's hands.

I know that you can do all things;
no plan of yours can be thwarted.
Job 42:2

Some people do not like to hear much of repentance; but I think it is so necessary that if I should die in the pulpit, I would desire to die preaching repentance, and if out of the pulpit I would desire to die practising it.

Matthew Henry, English minster (1662-1714)

What one thing do you most regret about last year, and what will you do about it this year?

Aargh! There are so many things. I hope you don't mind if I share them all with you all. I think it is important though that we confess our sins to one another so that we can be accountable to others in our repentance. I have a couple of close friends with whom I can share everything - their rebuke, encouragement, challenge and guidance is so important to me. I hope that people reading this have people in their life who can do this for them. I suppose it is a further example of the Titus 2 relationship between younger and older women.

As for doing something about it, I am trying day by day to turn away from sin and to set my eyes on Jesus and his teachings and example. I hope that I can show here that I am looking purposefully at what and where I need to change. I look forward to seeing what God has done in my life and how he has worked in me, until that day in glory, when we are made perfect in Christ.

Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper,
but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.
Proverbs 28:13

What book, in addition to the Bible, do you most want to read this year?

I think I have managed to deal with this one already thanks to Katrina's Fall into Reading challenge. I haven't progressed very far though so I will need to get cracking... I'm finding the accountability very helpful though, so I will have to reconsider this question in the New Year once this challenge is over. I have found an interesting site from Christianity Today that I might use to help me pick next year's books: The Top 50 Books That Have Shaped Evangelicals

Be as careful of the books you read as of the company you keep, for your habits and character will be as much influenced by the former as the latter.
Edwin Paxton Hood, English clergyman (1820-1885)

What's one thing you could do this year to enrich the spiritual legacy you will leave to your children and grandchildren?

I don't have any children or grandchildren yet, but I very much hope that I will have some in the future! I thought for a little while that I could get away with not answering this question, but I do think that it is something that I should be thinking about, even if there is nothing explicitly to do with children right now.

I am going to find a beautiful notebook then start making a concerted effort to write down some of my prayers. In months and years to come, I will be able to look back and see how God has answered these prayers. While I know that every prayer is answered in some way, even if it is not the way I would have liked, I would like to look back and remember what I prayed for and how God worked. Hopefully, I will then be able to share the story of God's mercy, grace and guidance in my life to my children and grandchildren.

Only take care, and keep your soul diligently, lest you forget the things that your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. Make them known to your children and your children's children - how on the day that you stood before the LORD your God at Horeb, the LORD said to me, 'Gather the people to me, that I may let them hear my words, so that they may learn to fear me all the days that they live on the earth, and that they may teach their children so.'

Deuteronomy 4:9-10

What's one new way you could be a blessing to your pastor (or to another who ministers to you) this year?

I am going to have to think about this more purposefully because I am sitting here trying to think what to do. I should pray for him and his family. I should pray for his own spiritual growth, his preaching and his ministry. I am doing that already, although I should be doing it a lot more.

So what is that "one new way" that I could be a blessing? I'd appreciate any thoughts if you had any from how you or others bless your pastor.

Let the elders who rule well be considered worthy of double honour, especially those who labour in preaching and teaching.

1 Timothy 5:17

What's the single most important thing you could do to improve the quality of your work life this year?

Work is so busy, but I hate when I get to the end of the day and realise that I was too busy to think of God. Again and again, I am reminded of the Lord's gentle yet firm words to Martha in Luke 10.

I need to try to come back to the Lord's feet throughout the day, almost to realign myself with God, to remind myself where my motivation comes from and to whose glory I do this. In one article from the London Institute of Contemporary Christianity I've read about living out a Christian faith in the workplace, this is described as "'on-the-run-spirituality', a rhythm of work that keeps us alert to God in our work."

Connecting with God in the Fast Lane by John Parminter reminds us that we cannot survive in our strength, but that we know a God who came as a man and understands our experiences and in whom is found immeasurable power and blessings.

Parminter offers some simple approaches that could easily be incorporated into dashing around work to 'practise the presence of God.'

I need to be more purposeful about resting and trusting in God throughout my day and in dedicating all my conversations and interactions with patients and colleagues to him, for I do it all to "glorify God and enjoy him forever."

But the Lord answered her, "Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her."
Luke 10:41-42

What is your most important financial goal this year, and what is the most important step you can take toward achieving it?

Now that the exam is over, I have to return to normal life and to the great list entitled, "Things to sort after Exam". It is a very long list! It ranges from "Write to E", "Paint kitchen", to "Sort out mortgage".

My original mortgage came to the end of its term a few months ago, so I really need to sort out a new one! Along with that, I need to look at my bank accounts in general, so I think it will mean a trip to the financial adviser for me.

Of course, I try to do this remembering that my true treasure is in heaven. I brought nothing into the world and will bring nothing out of it. I do not want (and pray that I will not fall into this temptation) to be rich with material wealth, but rather rich in good works, generous and ready to share, being content in both times of poverty and plenty, and trying to act wisely with the gifts with which God has entrusted me. I have been meditating on I Timothy 6 as I consider all these things.

Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs...As for the rich in this present age, charge them not to be haughty, nor to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly provides us with everything to enjoy. They are to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share, thus storing up treasure for themselves as a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of that which is truly life.

1 Timothy 6:6-10,17-19

Who do you most want to encourage this year?

Over the last year, I have loved getting to know a young woman from church. We're in the same profession, which is probably how we started talking, but our friendship has gone far beyond chit-chat about work. Of course, when we are together, we often compare patients or discuss potential diagnoses too, but our friendship has been built on our faith and our difficulties and struggles as we pursue biblical womanhood. We have spent hours talking, praying, reading together as we try to see what the Bible has to say to us and how to live it out. I hope we have been an encouragement and a blessing each other. I know I have grown so much through her friendship and I hope I have been an encourager to her.

I want to particularly pray for her as she, after being abandoned by her husband a few years ago, has now entered a time of courtship with a wonderful sound man. It has been so exciting to see this and I hope I can continue to be there for her, challenging and encouraging her through everything that this next year will bring.

For I long to see you, that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to strengthen you - that is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith, both yours and mine.
Romans 1:11-12