Friday, November 10, 2006
A Helper Fit for Him
I really enjoyed reading Sherrin's post on Titus this week. One sentence struck me:
I have such a busy job and spend a lot of time at work. Now I did know that life was going to be like this when I decided that I wanted to be a doctor and I can't claim to have been pulled in unawares! With all its demands though, it is so hard to keep my house on top of work commitments, never mind added to my church work, friends, family, and recreation. I do love my work - I find it fascinating and fulfilling - but my priorities have changed.
I really don't think that my job (as it stands at the moment) could not be compatible with a happy marriage. I could "have it all" - get married, have children, work full-time, get a cleaner to do the housework, put the children to daycare. I have plenty of friends and colleagues who do this, but that's not the wife, the mother or the doctor I wish to be. So it brings me to a conclusion that surprised me: if, God willing, I get married, should I give up my job and be a full-time homemaker to and for my husband, even before having children?
Then the LORD God said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him."
Genesis 2:18
All women can be homemakers no matter what their current work situation is. However, creating a welcoming home for our families and communities does take time and effort. This means that it is reasonable to conclude that at some times in our lives, particularly when there are young children at home, it will be necessary to cut back on paid work in order to fulfill this calling.I completely agree with her. I have long said that should I get married, I would want to stay at home with the children. However, this started another train of thought...
I have such a busy job and spend a lot of time at work. Now I did know that life was going to be like this when I decided that I wanted to be a doctor and I can't claim to have been pulled in unawares! With all its demands though, it is so hard to keep my house on top of work commitments, never mind added to my church work, friends, family, and recreation. I do love my work - I find it fascinating and fulfilling - but my priorities have changed.I really don't think that my job (as it stands at the moment) could not be compatible with a happy marriage. I could "have it all" - get married, have children, work full-time, get a cleaner to do the housework, put the children to daycare. I have plenty of friends and colleagues who do this, but that's not the wife, the mother or the doctor I wish to be. So it brings me to a conclusion that surprised me: if, God willing, I get married, should I give up my job and be a full-time homemaker to and for my husband, even before having children?
Then the LORD God said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him."
Genesis 2:18
Labels: biblical womanhood, family, homemaking, marriage, work
3 Comments:
Hi Kristy, thanks for the link and for sharing your thoughts more extensively here. I just read your comment on my blog and replied before I dropped over to your site and read this.
I would also like to mention (as well as what I have written in reply to you on my site) that some teachers argue that if woman is working full time she is spending most of her time helping someone other than her husband. I am not decided on this view, but it is certainly worth considering. I do believe that home and family are to be the priorities, but that will look different for each woman. God has made us finite - and we cannot really "have it all". Something has to give, and we do not want that "something" to be the role of helping our husbands! Perhaps after marriage you could cut back to part time work.
I would love to work part-time but it is just not possible unless you have young children. The funding just isn't there.
Marriage is not an immediate concern, so I imagine I have plenty of time to think about it! I suppose the deciding factor will be discussing this with my husband (whoever he is if he exists!) and agreeing with him what to do.
You've given me a lot to think about!
Interesting thoughts...let me know if you come to a conclusion. :)
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